i think that as much as this world is chaos and randomness, we have (at least) a small choice. you dont get to chose what happens to you. who you fall for. if your car gets a flat. who around you dies. if it rains during your vacation. but you do have control over what you do next. you control how you compose yourself, how you react from situations and what you learn from them.
you can literally be anything you want to be. you can pick up and move, be a new you. you can grow, or you can self destruct. its all on you. you can help yourself, or you can help others.
remember one thing: you didnt pave the road youre driving on, but you are holding the steering wheel.